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24/01/2013 / creepcv

Scandal Bag [n. s-can-d-al b-ag] A black bag used to carry groceries among other items

Most of us have our weekly activities, right?  You know, things you do on a regular weekly basis; things like vacuum (don’t even ask how many times I had to type that to spell it correctly…), mop the floors, brush your teeth, bathe, exercise, run the dish washer, eat, do my laundry, etc… Okay, you got me.  I do eat on a DAILY basis, not weekly.  I also don’t own a vacuum and mop my floor like 4 times a year.  But you people who bathe and brush your teeth only on a weekly basis… probs your new New Year’s Resolution should be to have some better hygiene, unless of course, you have great medical insurance.  I’m sure your dentists and doctors love you.

Honestly though, another activity that SHOULD BE part of our weekly routine: taking out the trash/garbage/rubbish (whatever you wanna call it).  I don’t care how many people you live with, I’m almost betting that most of our trash bags are ready to be disposed of after a week.  We just stretch it to “save bags,” right?  Or perhaps it really IS a chore to remove the trash from your house to an outside bin and you simply can’t find the 30 seconds – 1 minute that it will take to get rid of that nasty crap.  Me?  I have no clue how I accumulate so much rubbish in my kitchen trash bag.  What am I throwing away everyday?  I dunno and I’m not about to go look, either.  I throw most my food scraps outside, so I really don’t get it, but by the end of one week, BAM!  Stupid thing is filled up!  Do I take it out, though? Nope!  I literally have to walk about 10 steps outside to toss it in another bin, so it’s not like I gotta go far to get rid of it.   Maybe I’m trying to save on bags.  Yeah… I don’t use a legit trash bin, please, like I could A) afford it or 2) afford it.  Who needs a bin and expensive trash bags when you have an endless supply of scandal bags (errr grocery bags for you American folk)!

If there is ONE item in Jamaica that will NEVER be rationed, it’s definitely scandal bags.  Allow me to let you in on a little history of my habits.  I started collecting my grocery bags for trash bags, back in college.  haha… Especially junior year when my roommate and I would go to the self check-out lane and double bag our groceries (hey don’t want that pack of gum to fall through!  That sh*ts crucial to passing exams).  I mean, it’s the best way to get rid of an expense and it’s not like we needed/had a huge bin, anyway.  In Jamaica, I don’t even have to worry about getting things double bagged.   The bagger people here are always double/triple/quadruple bagging my stuff.  I honestly don’t understand.  Perhaps they KNOW that I need those bags for my garbage and they’re simply helping me out.  Wow.. what thoughtful people.  :-)  BUT this can become a problem.  My drawer of bags can only hold so many bags, and seeing as I, for some unknown reason, can’t take my trash out on a weekly basis like I should, I have an OVERFLOW of bags.  I mean, to the point where someone who hasn’t been to my house before, doesn’t need to ask where I keep my bags (duh, it’s the swelling drawer that can’t shut cuz  there are bags sticking out of it like a kid who “cleans” his room by shoving everything in the closet).

In order to solve this problem, I decided to start using my reusable grocery bags (one I got from Mega Mart upon my first shopping trip in Kingston, JA and the other Mummy sent me).  This way, when I go shopping, I don’t have to worry about accumulating more bags.  WRONG!  When it’s my turn to cash out, I give the reusable bags to the bagger people, thinking they’d understand to use them (why else would I hand them nylon bags?).  After I’ve already stacked about half my groceries on the revolving shelf thingy, I look up only to find that my groceries are being bagged in the scandal bags!  I stop and say, “oh no, I don’t need those bags, use these,” and I kindly pick up the bags previously handed to them.  The other day, the dude put a few items in each bag (and they’re big bags), then started to use the scandal bags.  I looked at him confused and said, “No man, it will all fit in the two bags, trust me. We just need to pack it better.”  I’ve also had people try and put my stuff in scandal bags THEN place them in my reusable bags.  SERIOUSLY PEOPLE?  I’m not sure they quite understand the concept of saving bags err re-using, OR as previously stated, maybe they think I need more trash bags for my house.

They also never learned how to properly bag items.  AHHHH!  At least they put the frozen stuff in newspaper, but as far as packing the items.  I do my best to categorize my items when I put them on the track; that way, all they need to do is place them in the bag as it comes to them.  Nope.  Lately, I try to get everything on the track as quickly as possible, then help with the bagging.  Oh dear.  Do grocery baggers in the States get any kind of training in proper bagging?  I just feel I don’t come across this issue quite as much over there than I do here in Jamaica.  The service, though.. GREAT.  I’m ALWAYS being offered for my bags to get carried somewhere for me.  Naturally, I don’t accept.  I use the heavy bags as a small part of my weight lifting for the day. Teehee :-P

In conclusion, what I’m trying to say: GO TAKE YOUR TRASH OUT!  I bet that rank smell that you “have no idea where it could be coming from,” will go away.  You’re welcome.

Scandal bag being used as trash bag

Scandal bag being used as trash bag

PS As soon as I post this, that photo will no long be current.

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